What is Emotional Intelligence?
Tuesday, May 7, 2013
Posted by: Dr. Alan Zimmerman
Dr. Zimmerman's TUESDAY
"It is very important to understand that emotional
intelligence is not the opposite of intelligence. It is not the triumph
of heart over head. It is the unique intersection of both."
David Caruso, author
Alan Zimmerman's Personal Commentary:
change. What was "in style" a few years ago is probably "out of
In fact, the
differences in fashion and style can be so dramatic that you can watch a movie
... and within two minutes ... you can say with certainty if that movie was set
in the 30's, 40's, 50's, 60's, 70's, 80's, 90's, or some other period.
course, just because a certain fashion is no longer "in style" does
not necessarily make that fashion bad.
The clothing in the 1950's probably served its purpose just as well as
clothing does in the 2010's.
simply like the look of something new, fresh, and different.
an author and speaker who focuses on transforming the people side of business,
I've noticed a similar trend in my industry.
The so-called "in" topics are often nothing more than
re-fashioned old concepts and practices.
What used to be called "stress management" is now commonly
referred to as "work-life balance." What used to be called "delegation"
is now called "empowerment."
And what used to be called Aristotle's "7 keys to success"
became Steven Covey's "7 habits of highly effective people."
of that is bad.
A new take on an old,
time-tested set of truths and skills can be very useful.
For example, I find today's emphasis on
"emotional intelligence" to be extremely important ... and perhaps a
better, more fitting terminology than what it used to called ...
extremely important because ...
Emotional intelligence is an accurate
predictor of success.
years, we naively thought if a person was intellectually sharp, if he had a
high I.Q., he would undoubtedly become successful in his endeavors.
And some of our schools still struggle with
this concept, somehow thinking that high grades in school translate to high
levels of success at work and at home.
Goleman debunked that myth in study after study.
In one study of Harvard graduates in the
fields of law, medicine, education, and business, Goleman found that the scores
on their entrance exams ... which is another way of getting at someone's I.Q.
... had no, absolutely no correlation with their eventual career success.
Indeed, in many cases, just the opposite was
true; the higher their scores on their entrance exams, the lower their levels
of professional success later on in life.
he dug deeper into studies such as that, Goleman found that a person's
emotional intelligence ... or their personal and interpersonal skills ...
carried much more weight than a person's I.Q. in determining which of the
individuals would emerge as leaders.
fact, he concluded that no more than 25% of a person's success could be
attributed to I.Q.
Goleman may have been generous in his conclusion.
According to R. Sternberg in "Successful
Intelligence," a more careful analysis suggests the figure may be no
greater than 10%, and in some studies only 4%.
That means that your I.Q. leaves 75% to 96% of your job success
If you want to get ahead, if
you want to be outrageously successful, having a high I.Q. or just plain being
smart won't do it for you.
intellect isn't enough.
proficiency won't win the prize.
got to have emotional intelligence.
question about it.
What is emotional intelligence?
has four components.
They're very much
like the four corners of a building, where each corner represents a different
set of skills.
If ALL ... not just some
... if all four corners are set right and in
good shape, you can make a very sturdy, functional building.
And likewise, if you have all four parts of
emotional intelligence mastered, chances are you will be a very happy and
successful individual ... on and off the job.
first corner is Self-Awareness. You're able to figure out your feelings and
And many people
don't even have this first foundational piece in place.
They're like the tombstone epitaph I saw in
England that read, "Here lies a man who came into this world and left it
without ever knowing who he was."
second corner is Self-Management.
though it's important, as Socrates advised to "know thyself," it's
You have to know what feels
good and what feels bad and how to go from bad to good.
You have to know how to use your
self-awareness so you can manage yourself and conduct yourself appropriately
It won't work to tell
the world, "This is who I am.
it or leave it."
Most people will choose to
leave you behind if that's how you behave.
third corner is Social Awareness.
it; almost everything you do is done in a world of people, and almost
everything you do well is done when you are "in tune" with the people
That takes Social Awareness.
In other words, you must be able to read and
understand the feelings and reactions of others if you're going to be highly
fourth corner is Relationship Management.
You must know how to inspire, influence, encourage and develop others to
work with you rather than against you.
Like all the other corners of Emotional Intelligence, this is a set of
skills you can learn.
our space is limited in the "Tuesday Tip," let me briefly highlight
the first corner of Emotional Intelligence.
How do I start to enhance my Self-Awareness?
should be fairly simple, as Rachel Burkholder shared in her story.
She talked about the time her parish priest
was leaving for a new assignment.
day before he was to leave, a little girl ran up to him and tearfully threw her
arms around him in a good-bye embrace.
The priest consoled the child, kissing her cheeks, while cheerfully
saying, "And where did you get those cute rosy cheeks?"
The little girl replied, "Oh, that's
Self-Awareness should be fairly simple, but some people spend a whole lifetime
and never get to know themselves.
pity, because it truly hinders the development of their Emotional Intelligence
and thereby their effectiveness in everything they do.
increase your Self-Awareness, start asking yourself a number of "Brave
Questions" and do some thinking about your answers.
might even get a copy of my book on "Brave Questions".
are a few questions to get you started.
What are your gifts
is born with talent.
You may be unaware
of your unique talents, simply because your talents are so much a part of you
that they often seem hardly worth mentioning.
Begin the process by asking yourself ... What have you always been able
to do with very little effort?
your friends and family continually ask you to do over everyone else?
What activities are you consistently drawn
subject do you never tire of discussing?
What topics cause your ears to perk up when someone across the room
begins to discuss one or more of those topics?
What causes you to stop your channel surfing when you see it come across
Do you read a number of books all focused on
a particular subject?
What do you find
to be of perennial interest?
has a fire burning inside them, even though for some people the fires have
never been encouraged to do more than smolder.
What is it that would flare up and burn brightly in you if you gave it
the slightest opportunity?
Is it a
cause, a vocation, a book you want to write, or picture you want to paint?
What do you find yourself daydreaming about?
can be more effective in EVERY part of your life ... if you increase your
That's why every
keynote I deliver and every seminar I give teaches people how they can
transform themselves, their relationships, and their organizations.
Life and work are just too important to not
get it right.
five minutes each day this week to get to know yourself better ... to increase
want to hear your comments and feedback.
Join the conversation.
About the author:
As a best-selling author and Hall of Fame professional speaker,
Dr. Alan Zimmerman is focused on "transforming the people side of
business.” His keynotes and seminars are noted for high content, high energy,
and high involvement that transform people's lives and the companies where they
Click here to learn
more about his programs and products, or to receive a free subscription to his
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© 2013 Zimmerman Communi-Care Network, Inc.
Reprinted with permission from Dr. Alan Zimmerman's Internet
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